Choosing to Let it Go

I received an email exchange Friday morning in my professional job role that really upset me upon first reading.  I won't get into the details of who it involved or what it was about, but suffice it to say that the comments made by this particular individual were very disappointing to me --especially in their leadership position.  My mind began to spring to action, drafting the best response I could think of to counter the arguments.  After all (in my own mind) they were completely wrong and we were right!

But then, I stopped...

I chose just  not to respond.  Why?  The email exchange really didn't deserve a response.  Enough information was enclosed in the response to give my team what we needed to do our job.  It has become clearly obvious that continued dialog with this individual in situations like this only makes the matter worse.  Sometimes, you just have to let it go.

This is a new behavior for me.  I'm clearly a  perfectionist who tends to immediately want to fix everything and do whatever I can to keep the peace.  Letting things go does NOT come easily for me!

I've been following Chris Foreman's blog lately and admire his artfully illustrated mind maps.  Recently he posted a great piece on the art of non-reaction.

How true this is!  Paul starts his blog post off, "Twenty seconds of thinking can ruin your day, only if you let it."  I read that email right before going into a huge presentation.  My first feelings were of irritation and disbelief.  Luckily my presentation consumed my morning though, taking my thoughts elsewhere quickly.  By the time I returned to my desk in the afternoon and was able to catch up with my staff member, the situation in my mind had somewhat distilled itself.  He and I still could not believe the choice of words, but agreed it was best to just leave things alone and do what we needed to do to get our work done.

Sometimes, inaction is more powerful than action.  At this point, I'm still learning about my audience in this particular client group.  Quick reaction is not going to better position my team to provide better support to them.  There is another side to the story after all and I'm doing my best to understand the thoughts behind the words and actions they've chosen.  Over time I'm confident the partnership between these functions will improve.  It will take time though and sometimes patience is not easy to come by -- for either side.

So, in this situation, we consciously chose not to join an argument or follow non-productive thinking.  A response may still be in order when I return to the office Monday morning.  But at least taking a few moments to pause has helped me look at the bigger picture and not react purely out of emotion.

Trying to Keep the Passion in a "Day Job"

It's Monday and I really struggled with getting out of bed and into the office today.  We had such a wonderful weekend and didn't want it to end.  This morning had all the feelings of my work being just my "day job" again.  If I'm not careful, this is the laundry list of what begins to feel like drudgery when I'm at my "day job":

• reading/answering email
• answering questions (often it seems like the same question over and over again)
• filing papers
• attending meetings
• making phone calls
• setting goals and making plans
• following-up
• analyzing data
• making decisions
• giving advice
• maintaining spreadsheets and preparing reports
• managing and training employees
• giving presentations
• and the list goes on...

The details occasionally become overwhelming from time to time -- especially wearing two professional hats as a Compensation Manager and an entrepreneur with Peace of Mind Drug & Background Screening. It's a challenge to step back and keep the bigger picture in my mind... I really DO love my job and find joy in what I do for a living.

Chris Brogan expressed some great thoughts in a recent blog post.  Chris goes on to define a job as just a measurement of work.  He promptly reminded that one needs to work to find work.

It's you.  And it's your mindset... You're here to work.  You're here to make meaning.  But you're not here to fill a job. That time is past.  ~ Chris Brogan

So, what is my passion...that element of joy that I am able to find in my work when I adjust my mindset enough to find it?  Well, to be honest... in everything I involve myself in, seems to always distill itself down to these two very simple points:

1. Creating order amidst chaos, and
2. Helping people find their way.

Without keeping those points in mind, all the details just become routine tasks and jobs to do each and every day.  However, the feeling is very different when I am counseling a manager on how to talk with their employees to understand their pay or develop themselves professionally.  It's also a very different feeling when you can help people take stock in where they are and try to make their lives better.  There is a bigger, more important purpose behind all this activity.

So, a slight attitude adjustment this morning helped me put the day back in perspective and get a productive start to the week.  Here's hoping for more days of finding the passion and less days of experiencing the dreaded "day job."

Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might...  ~Ecclesiastes 9:10

Good Things Growing

Peace of Mind 
Drug & Background Screening
www.CatchThemQuick.com

Today's joy is a bit of proud self-promotion.  It's been a great week for Peace of Mind Drug & Background Screening, the business my husband and I started at the beginning of this year.  How many people do you know determined enough to start a venture in this tough economy?  Well, we did and we're so proud to see some really positive things happen.  Hard work is being rewarded and the business is growing.  I'm even stepping out from behind the bookkeeping and am providing some impromptu field support when needed in a pinch... including the occasional random drug test and background check.  The most rewarding times come when I hear clients express how much they appreciate how my husband makes them feel... like a human being, treated with respect and dignity, without automatic judgement.  It is my hope and prayer we will be able to make a positive impact in the community through our business, helping people put their lives back together.

There is no greater joy nor greater reward than to make a fundamental difference in someone's life.   ~ Sister Mary Rose McGeady

We've called you in for your random drug test.  Any questions?

Joy in Nature: 6 Lessons from Walter Gator

Lately I've been trying to start a ritual of journaling more regularly over my first cup of coffee in the morning.  Ever since reading The Artist's Way the idea of writing morning pages intrigued me as a great way to break up the log jam of thoughts muddled in my head when I woke up each day.  I've even found a great spot for this morning "brain dump" during weekdays on the dock behind the office building where I work.  One morning recently I was pleasantly surprised by some spontaneous observations.

Meet my new friend Walter Gator.  This is the nick name I've given one of the mascots currently residing in the retention pond behind my office building.  One morning as I was writing my morning pages I noticed out of the corner of my eye a movement in the water that made me put down my pen and just stare.  There Walter was, just quietly submerged except for the top of his head sticking out of the water quietly looking back at me.  I was simply awestruck seeing such an impressive animal in the wild that close.  Upon reflection, I see Walter taught me a few lessons about joy too.

Sometimes Joy Just Shows Up
Walter moved in the water just enough to catch my eye.  I wasn't looking for him at all.  In fact, I was completely focused on something else.  That made me think of the many times in my life when something that made me the happiest showed up when I wasn't specifically looking for it and was content keeping my usual routines.


Sometimes Joy Takes Unexpected Forms
I'm not particularly a fan of alligators.  After all, I'm originally from Tennessee and it's a challenge to show your Volunteer Pride deep from the heart of Florida Gator country and not catch grief.  For some reason though, I couldn't help but smiling after my encounter with Walter Gator.  I guess not all gators are bad.  :-)


Joy Brings Calm

This particular morning started out in the usual way... a to-do list a mile long waited for me to tackle and even more demands were on their way to my in-box.  The stress and tension had already built up on my commute in to work and I was overwhelmed of where to even start for the day.  As soon as I saw Walter Gator though, I stopped what I was doing.  He captured my attention and I was completely mesmerized.  Before I knew it, ten whole minutes had passed by and I realized I had just been sitting still as I stared at him.  My breathing had automatically slowed and become less shallow.  There was a quietness in the air that was so peaceful.  Walter Gator had easily calmed me.
 
More Joy Lies Beneath the Surface

I only saw Walter Gator's full body silhouette the first time I saw him out of the corner of my eye.  The rest of the time he floated still in the water with just his head above the surface.  The water was just clear enough that I could see there was more to him than just the prehistoric head peeking up at me.

Experiencing Joy Makes You Want to Share

I was the only person sitting on the dock when Walter Gator decided to come swim so close.  My first reaction was to instantaneously get up and go to the railing to watch him.  The second reaction was to look around me and see if anyone was standing outside of the building that may have wanted a closer look.  My third reaction was to pull out my cell phone and start snapping pictures.  I sent my husband texts about my visitor and sent posts to my friends on Facebook.  Finally another employee came up beside me on the dock and we had a great conversation about Walter Gator.  And when it was time for me to go back inside and get to work, I had to pull out the pictures and show my boss and co-workers too.  Walter Gator really was something to see and I just wanted everyone else to share the joy too.

One Joy is Often Near Even Larger Joy

You can see from these pictures that Walter Gator isn't an extremely large alligator.  I estimate he was probably about 5-6 feet long from the tip of his nose to the end of his tail.  As I was sharing my joy with my co-workers I quickly heard there had been sightings the previous day of an even larger alligator in the pond.  In my tenure with my company I've heard all sorts of tales about gators in the pond and some of them having to be carried away when they got too large.  All great stories and hearsay are keeping me on the lookout for Walter Gator's larger siblings out there!

So, it's not every day I have an alligator swim up beside me and just hang out for a while.  He definitely brought a smile to my face and calmness to my heart.

I'd love to hear your stories about what you've seen in nature that really brought you joy.